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Saturday, April 10, 2004

Hmm.....

To give you just a short review of the things I have been doing for the last few days, I have been practicing in the choir, getting ready for a big youth service on the 18th.
We now have a vocal teacher who is giving us lessons on how to vocalize and sing better.
Surprisely enough I am learning new techniques how to improve my singing....well, what can I say, it runs in the family.....My brother is a singer. He's in a Latin Band called LATIN-FORCE....Although I am not a big fan of his music, he is doing pretty good. They are about to record their second CD and have been to many Hispanic countries promoting the group and all.....Who knows, may be one day he will make it.
Anyway, back to me, I bought on EBAY a few cool Jackie Chan movies to add to my little 30 something DVD collection. I fought hard to get some DVDs as some other EBAY members were trying to win the same movie...GGrr....One of them won one of my DVDs. I wanted to kill the dude, yet, Gezz, how could I !?..... I was very upset, yet, he he he, having some extra connection with the GUY_GOD_ Upstairs has its benefit^_~ because I found the same movie at an even cheaper price. ^_^ God soOOooOO loves me.....LOL.......I laughed and imagined myself saying to the dude "IN YOUR FACE HUH"... :O) Yeah!!
Well, I not only got some Jackie Chan Movies but some other movies as well. Here is the list:
HALF OF KUNG FU
FEARLESS HYENA II
REVENGE OF THE DRAGON
THE YOUNG MASTER
SHAOLIN WOODEN MEN
POLICE STORY I
DRUNKEN MASTER
GORGEOUS
CITY HUNTER
TO KILL WITH INTRIGUE
RUMBLE IN THE BRONX
RUMBLE IN HONG KONG
NEW FIST OF FURY
WHEELS ON MEALS
RUSH HOUR I
RUSH HOUR II
BLACK DRAGON
ART OF ACTION
THE MUMMY
THE MUMMY RETURN
LOST IN SPACE
THE MASK
THE GRINCH

*Some of those movies I had them already but on VHS and just wanted to replace them for DVDs.
I have already also Pre-Ordered "The Return of The King" and "The Last Samurai." Both movies will be available on May.__I so cannot wait to see them.
Anyway, there it goes my little tax return money. But what can I say, those movies were a must. Beside, i knew i was going to go shopping anyway with that money. ^_~

Hmmm, what else about me>......Oh yeah, I still feeling the necessity of staying away from everyone and just basically spending lots of time by myself. ___I dunno, I feel like I am changing. The things I used to like, I don't like them any more. What used to make me happy, it does not make me happy any more. I have been reevaluating my whole life.
I think change its good, at least sometimes it is...yet, It scares me, as I am usually more comfortable when I know what its coming ,and when I know what is going on.....Not that I am a control freak, but just like to play it safe sometimes. I guess, playing it safe, just do exactly that....SAVE YOU from disappointments.


I do hate, or..hmm..let me use another word.....I DO DISLIKE, the idea of letting everyone read what I am typing in here, yet, It frees me. __ I know, I know. I am a little complicated sometimes; but recently, someone told me that being complicated actually makes me an interesting person.....To which i personally think " Yeah right buddy"...LOL

I dunno, I see people here and there, and I am just like imagining their whole life. Sometimes, I am in a room and feel like if I am not. Just as if my mind is working somewhere else...analyzing here, analyzing there. When would all these stop? __ Not that I mind at all, yet, it is exhausting.
I like to figure people. I like to figure why they act the way they do. I love history, and learning from people or our past is important to me....Like I heard someone saying "We should learn from the past mistakes of others because we will not live long enough to make all those mistakes again."

These days I am more quite.....These days nothing really moves me....It's like if I've past to another state or dimension......Sort of trying to reinvent myself, or truly get to know the real me again......
Sometimes, you can loose yourself trying to please so many people at the same time......Then, you stand just wondering and asking yourself who you really are.
I have learned from experience that you should not let people define you as a person...and even if you are shy, being shy does not define who you are. It is just your reaction to your sorroundings at a particular moment.
I am beginning to embrace my weakness since I know now I can learn a great deal about them and about the person I want one day to become, and about the person I don't want to be.
Life is a puzzle. One that I have to be patience and let it unfold day by day.
I have heard so many people say" Live everyday as if it was the last day of your life"....that is what I want to do......It's hard...And honestly___and sorry if I disappoint someone__I don't know how to do it...but i am trying.

I met someone not long ago that was so full of life....Great friend....He loves the outdoors and always encourages me to go out and have fun, and let my worries rest for a while.....He has this free spirit.......Remindes me when i was a kid.....When i didn't care what others would think of me.....Not sure what happened with that kid....Not sure if it is just hiding inside and trying to gain its way back to the surface....but one thing it is sure is that I wish that kid was me again.
I am not a melancholic person....I guess just my emotional state at the moment. And even though it sounds like a no hope business, I think that the mere fact that I am thinking about who I was once its a sign that changes are coming...Because I have realized from where I came and AGAIN where I am trying to go.......SO, I WILL JUST KEEP ON WALKING..........Yeah...Keep on Walking Child!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY EASTER!!!!

and please, leave the Bunny alone.
ha ha ha ha ha ha


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